Smoking Monkeys!

What's funnier than a smoking monkey? Nothing, I tell you. Maybe someone trying to be cool tripping and falling. But, other than that, no idea.

The first use of a smoking monkey dates back to the middle ages when explorers from Spain brought chimps back from their excursions to Africa. Thinking they were human, the Spanish attempted to befriend these creatures by offering them everything from the finest brandy to a weekend with their wives and daughters.

After the main explorer, Prince Marco Devanzino, soured on the idea, he handed his prized monkey "Senor Alfaro" a freshly rolled cigarette.

Legend has it the explorers AND their wives laughed for three days. Non-stop.

The Buddy

This guy will listen to all of your problems. Look at him. Keep him in smokes and he's happy to listen to you talk about how you figured out a cool way to integrate the parallax effect into your portfolio blog. He seems to care, doesn't he? Oh yes.

The Agent

Here is a fellow who will book you into the finest venues this side of hell for a mere 23% commission. He is a go-getter and, as you can tell, he was quite a draw himself back in the day. Though if you bring this up, you will be spending the next 20 minutes watching his "tight 10".

Got it Together

He made a fortune in soy futures 20 years ago and since then, has devoted himself to becoming the best dad he can be. He's already shown the teachers in his son's school how to listen to the kids for a change. Go and figure that!!